Thursday, July 9, 2009

postive or negative.. that is the question

ok so tommorrow is the last of the big days for the newmans.. I go first thing in the am for my pregnancy test.. to see if all this we have been thru the last month has paid off. I have to say I am alil worried.. I have been thru every emotion possible today. Our lives can possibly be changed tommorrow is just an unreal thought to me.

Our son Nathan was a clomid baby, We have had trouble concieving since we started after we first got married six years ago. We did many rounds of clomid and a few days after levis 2nd deployment we got prego.. 2 weeks later I called the doc and said something isnt right.. n 4 hours later found out we were expecting it was one of the best days of my life thus far. Hopefully tommorrow will be added to that list. As u guys know my hubby is gone again. and half a world away knew that I would be stressed today, he called tonight to tell me he loves me. and to keep prayin. To have faith. And no matter what the result he is soo proud of me for goin thru all this. I love him n am truly blessed to have my boys ( levi n nathan) in my life.

I also wanted to say that i talked a person I trust and have a great respect for, he told me that even tho being a parent is very important to me, that what matters n helps defines us as people is havin the faith and the strength to pick our selves up after something bad happens. In this case the gettin pregnant. For me I know it will not be the end of the world but it will break my heart again. And when it comes to pregnancy n tryin I have had enough of my share of that.

Please keep us in your prayers tonight.. I could use all the positive thoughts comin this way. thanks again to all my friends n family and there support u guys mean more to me then u know!! thanks again guys! expect an update tommorrow~~

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