another day done

so these last few weeks have been tryin to say the least. A toddler bout to turn three, a prego mom n daddy deployed (bein brave as nathan wil ltell u) and two dogs.. its much on the plate. Nathan is a great n very intellegent kid, but he is a totally different child when it is just him and I. He hits me n yells at me all the time. The thing I have take the most pride in is my family. But I am at my whitts end really dont know what else I can do Itry time out, a try ignorin him when he throws fits, I try talkin to him calmly n hate to admit but I have caught myself yellin back. I am just really at a stand still. And while I am being spread in soo many directions bein a mom is my number one priority. Ineed help so advice? anything will be great! on another note, went to the doc today n baby is doin well. The concensis is its a girl but we shall see. The heart beat was good n got to hear it for the first time today! Talked to the hubby this am. He is well just lookin forward to this deployment bein over, still got a few more months. I guess I should go wanna do some scrapbookin.

sorry its been a while.

Those of you who follow my blog probably already know bout the last few days! things have been rough. But instead of dwellin on the hard parts, I wanna focus on the blessings! The blessing we have growin inside my belly~ The beautiful son Levi n I have already been blessed with, n the family n friends that have been my support system day in n day out! I love my sister U are amazing. I dont know what else to say that seems to sum it up! U are so awesome n have been there for us more then I ever imagined~! thank u for that!~ Time to get some rest i am super sleepy! nini

aint that some shit?!~

so the last few days have been interesting I guess. Nathan has been hell on wheels, I dont know y, hopin it will pass soon. I dont know if its the hormones or what but my fuse is short, n the acting out, hittin, n yellin at me isnt goin to well.! I miss my hubby.. which obviously that happens durin deployments. Monday is my first ultrasound. Its goin be bitter sweet i am super excited to see our lil peanut. Other then that, my sis seems to have lost someone she thought was a friend. Which I know can be hard, So I just wanna send a shout out to my sis.. i love you. n am here for u. I gotta get back to bed. Will update u when i know whats up with the ultrasound.. ttys~

everything is still setting in

the last few weeks have been eventful to say the least. With the Ivf and adjusting to levi bein gone again, every time our hubbys deploy its an adjustment. Luckily these next few months are goin be filled with tons to do. and then before I know it levi will be home!! woo hoo

lil man is sick gotta take him to the doc today!~ I hate goin to evans, the docs are not to bad but the pharmacy is a night mare!~ any way hope everyone has a great day!!!

a happy day

as some of u may already know.. The test came back positive. God has blessed our family again. Words can not express the feelings I have... It has been a hard, intense, few weeks. Ivf is something that is amazing and unbelievable for what it gives the chance for couples who may not otherwise have a child that precious gift! Levi and i were blessed with nathan. And to use the word unbelievable one more time, is the only word that seems to do the experience of being his mom in to a word. He is truly our angel baby! It hasnt always been easy as my fellow moms know n understand at time all to well! I am soo thankful for the thoughts n prayers everyone has given us. thank u guys!! i should take my happy ass to bed. can se all the sleep i can get these days!!

postive or negative.. that is the question

ok so tommorrow is the last of the big days for the newmans.. I go first thing in the am for my pregnancy test.. to see if all this we have been thru the last month has paid off. I have to say I am alil worried.. I have been thru every emotion possible today. Our lives can possibly be changed tommorrow is just an unreal thought to me.

Our son Nathan was a clomid baby, We have had trouble concieving since we started after we first got married six years ago. We did many rounds of clomid and a few days after levis 2nd deployment we got prego.. 2 weeks later I called the doc and said something isnt right.. n 4 hours later found out we were expecting it was one of the best days of my life thus far. Hopefully tommorrow will be added to that list. As u guys know my hubby is gone again. and half a world away knew that I would be stressed today, he called tonight to tell me he loves me. and to keep prayin. To have faith. And no matter what the result he is soo proud of me for goin thru all this. I love him n am truly blessed to have my boys ( levi n nathan) in my life.

I also wanted to say that i talked a person I trust and have a great respect for, he told me that even tho being a parent is very important to me, that what matters n helps defines us as people is havin the faith and the strength to pick our selves up after something bad happens. In this case the gettin pregnant. For me I know it will not be the end of the world but it will break my heart again. And when it comes to pregnancy n tryin I have had enough of my share of that.

Please keep us in your prayers tonight.. I could use all the positive thoughts comin this way. thanks again to all my friends n family and there support u guys mean more to me then u know!! thanks again guys! expect an update tommorrow~~

today is the day!!

things have been great the last few days! the retrieval went well. they got 14 eggs, 11 fertilized. There were 4 grade A embreyos meanin that they were perfect as good as they get. Then we had 4 grade B embreyos. Still very good, followed by 3 grade C's. yesterday was transfer day! We were told my our doc they were the best embreyos he has seen in quite sometime. Just stunning, text book perfect! We made the joint decision to put 2 grade A embreyos in. On the day of the transfer they look at each embreyo to make sure they are dividing properly. They like them do bedivided in to 6 or 8 cells. We were told prior to the transfer that they were 8 cells. When they went to do the tranferr they said they were both divided into 10 cells which is amazing. So all in all yesterday was good day! Today is another big day! Levi ships out today. The sooner it starts the sooner he comes home!~ please keep him n all of our other men n woment nad there families fighting overseas in your hearts and prayers!